There’s a dynamic tension between grace and effort, between letting go and conscious engagement. From one angle, we could say that the very notion of an individual self who is steering the process and exerting effort to achieve some future goal is itself exposed at a certain point as part of the illusion of separation. In the moments of deepest realization, it becomes stunningly clear that there is no substantial “me” authoring choices and actions, no real center from which practice and inquiry are being directed. All is simply unfolding according to its own perfect, spontaneous rhythm, its own ineffable intelligence.

And yet, it is impossible to deny that the particular habits of mind and motivational currents associated with goal-fixation and self-discipline do seem to have a significant shaping influence on how the journey actually presents for many. The very intensity of the urge to awaken, to understand, to reach some imagined spiritual finish line, can act as a powerful alchemical fire, a kind of evolutionary fuel for the process.

Ultimately, I think that there is no fundamental contradiction to be reconciled here, only a living paradox to be navigated with ever-increasing sensitivity and skillfulness. The key lies in our relationship to spiritual seeking, and the network of hopes and beliefs around effort and attainment.

In the early stages of the journey, these structures and energies often serve an important function, providing a necessary kind of psychic scaffolding, directing attention and intention in a way that helps to create a container for practice and unfoldment. The essential point is to hold it all lightly, to engage the relative apparatus of seeking as a tactical ally rather than a source of ultimate identity.

Over time, there is a natural relaxation of the grasping and strategizing mind even as we continue to participate fully in whatever forms of applied effort and technique feel organic and enlivening. So in the end, it is a delicate dance of the active and the passive principles, of fully showing up and letting go in the same breath.